Well did I tell you about when Maya spilled the tomato juice? Oh my, you’ll love this. You know my friend Maya, she’s the cute little blonde girl who wears those bejeweled capris. Yes, I do know her from episode 32 of How I Met Your Mother, titled “Single Stamina,” in which Barney invites his gay, black brother James, played by me, to “liven” up the gang’s life since everyone else has been “coupled” off and Barney is alone, and I am an exact duplicate of Barney, except gay, and it’s soon revealed that I am going to marry my partner Tom. That’s exactly right, how did you remember that?
Well anyway, Maya and I were in my trailer macraméing a Thanksgiving sweater. I know, I love Thanksgiving sweaters too! So Maya and I were drinking tomato juice and Maya set hers down on the coffee table. I said to her, “Careful, Maya, that’s real close to the edge!” and she went, “Wayne, don’t be such a nervous Wayney!” I just rolled my eyes and went on macraméing. Oh, such macraméing you’ve never seen! My sweater had an owl and a dreamcatcher! We were just drinking our tomato juice and listening to Jodi Picoult audiobooks and macraméing the night away! And guess what! Maya spilled her tomato juice on my sweater because she’d left her glass too close to the edge of the table, just like I’d warned! I was sad but then I had to do my scene and I was still sad but now I’m okay. I can’t drink tomato juice anymore but I can still macramé like my job is someone who macremés great sweaters.
Tags: how i met your mother, jodi picoult, macramé, sweaters, tomato juice, wayne brady
